Saturday, 29 September 2012

Football Cliches

Just a short post today. One of the things I hate most about football is that it's riddled with tiresome cliches. In my previous post, I wrote about how many of these cliches, beliefs and generalisations, were not based on statistical fact and many were actually downright wrong. Today, I stumbled across a brilliant website which is dedicated towards writing about football cliches. The first post I read (posted on the Betting Expert website but written by the same author), made me laugh more than just about any blog post I've ever read:

What the average TV pundit knows about the Euro 2012 teams

This website is superbly written and so spot-on with its insight, I couldn't resist adding it to my blogroll, despite the fact it is unrelated to trading. If you love football, I urge you to take a look. I will no longer curse at the glut of cliches I hear every single day relating to football and thanks to this site, will instead learn to laugh at them.

It is still quite depressing that the likes of Shearer and Hansen can get paid so much for doing so little. Hansen once admitted that he was a Premier League elitist (his words) i.e. he only likes and bothers watching the big clubs. Shearer once famously admitted he didn't know anything about his own club Newcastle United's newest big name signing (Hatem Ben Arfa, I think it was), despite the fact he was analysing the player on Match of the Day! The above post was made with pundits like these two in mind - experts who make no effort to do any research and just turn up and blurt out tired old cliches in an attempt to mask their lack of knowledge. Enjoy!

Anastasia Pivovarova:


  1. Despite being a avid footy fan all my life, after watching the Olympics and seeing how other sports are played, i.e. fairly and with respect for the opponents and the sport, I really wasn't looking forward to the new season. After going to the Paralympics, my enthusiasm for football diminished even further than I could ever imagine. I used to literally watch all the televised games and highlights, but as of today I haven't seen any football what so ever in the past three weeks now, and can't really say I miss it.

    The main reasons I can't seem to enjoy it any more is as I mentioned in a previous post, but the commentator’s clichés should definitely be added to that list! Also the manager’s interviews are always the same old same old. If one team was awarded a pen, the manager will claim he saw it as light as day and it was no way a pen, while the other manager will claim he didn't see it clearly. The goal scorer will claim his spectacular goal wasn't the most important thing and that he is just happy for the team, while next week even though his team won, the same player will throw his toys out his pram because he wasn't picked. Then of course we have to listen to Linkers god awful jokes and ‘stats’, boring Shearer picks the few words he has floating around in his brain and spits them out, while Hanson bangs on about the defence again, regardless of just how unstoppable a goal was. Needless to say, I think I’m done with football, at least for now.

    With the extra spare time this leaves me, I think I will try and follow some new sports, as I did in the Olympics and Paralympics, or perhaps visit the outside world and play some tennis, I could give you a game perhaps, although I suck as I’ve only just started. I think I’m obsessed with tennis, as when I’m not trading it, I’m play it on the computer (SNES Smash Tennis is the nuts, especially four player!), and now I’m playing it in the real world too!

    Getting back to my new sports watching adventures, I wonder what new clichés I will discover there. My number one hated clichés in football is 'if this was a boxing match.......blah blah blah'. Guaranteed to be said every-time a team is under substance pressure!!! I’ve noticed this has started to creep in to tennis as well! Still at least I haven’t heard that annoying women commentator on B365 for a while! Man heard voice went right through me! Speaking of which, my Asda microwave chicken curry ain’t sitting too pretty at the moment so I’ll end my rant here.

  2. You sound like you've had a bad day, Jack! I suppose cliches are inevitable, there's only so many ways you can describe what is essentially the same thing happening over and over again. It's just the ones which are outdated or used when there is no substance to them, that get on my nerves.

    The only matches I've watched this season have involved my own team, Forest and Man City v Real. I can't be bothered with football anymore, it just doesn't excite me anymore. The last 20 mins of Man City v Real Madrid was good but the way everyone was creaming themselves afterwards, you'd think it was match of the century - it was garbage for the first hour.

    Don't think I ever played Smash Tennis, might have to see if I can find it online. I used to have Super Tennis, was the first SNES game I ever bought, back in the day. I have to admit, I would rather be doing anything than staring at the PC even more, once I've stopped trading. I'd play you at tennis though I don't even have a racquet, not hit a ball for many, many years!

  3. Actually that was the last game I watch too, and agreed only the last 20 mins was great. Didn't know everyone was creaming themselves after.

    You can play Smash Tennis online here

    or can download emulator and rom here

    Great in one player but game really comes in to it's own with more players. The desperate diving from side to side is fantastic. Seems pretty basic at first so easy to pick up, but the more you play, the more you find out how to get awesome angles and power. Super tennis looks very similar and think I owned this too at some point in the past.

    I know what you mean regarding getting away for the PC screen, so if you ever fancy a real game of tennis, just give me a shout (I have a spare racket), as could do with playing someone else other than my GF who always beats me (I'm not bitter) :)

  4. Thanks for that, will take a look. Whereabouts in the country are you?

  5. SW London, just down the road from Wimbledon tennis funny enough! I'm sure I read on your profile somewhere once that your located in Richmond or Twickenham area?

    Congrats on your 'bad' month. Over 50% ROI on a bad month is nothing to be sniffed at, although can understand how it must be frustrating in not being able to use that money to build your bank. At least your safe in the knowledge that once your in a position to compound, your profits so go from strength to strength.

    I'd be happy with a few consistent months at present as currently riding a bit of a roller coaster.

  6. Actually, the 50% is my average profit per month as a percentage of bank, over the year. Not meaning to brag but my ROI is far higher than 50% ;)

    I don't and never have lived in West London, though I used to live in North London. I'm in Nottingham now, so can't really nip down for a game! Maybe next year, when I hope to move back if I can ever get those profits compounded.

    The roller-coaster will end one day. It usually comes after you've learnt how to control your reds and keep them low. My advice is to forget about the greens and just practice trying to keep your bank as close to break-even as possible. Once you learn how to do that, the greens take care of themselves.

  7. Oh well, probably a lucky escape for me then! For now I'll have to continue to lose 6-1 / 6-1 to my GF :)

    I thought I was past the roller-coaster stage after having my break through year last year, but that was quickly followed by the worst 6 months ever this year that almost wiped me out!

    Since then though and as you rightly say, I've been concentrating a lot more on managing the reds. Similar to you I've reduced my stakes, but my ROI have increased and my maximum liability considerably reduced, so slowly moving in the right direction.

    As a long time reader it great to see finally see your hard work paying off! Whatever your actual ROI is, I personally don't see it as bragging at all, along with your screen shots I find it spurs me on and shows me what is possible. I'll write more about that in reply to your latest post.


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